I can be the one
by butrflykissez
Summary: Bella and Jasper are twins. Her father is abusive and She has to raise her little sister. her best friend is gay and in between everything else, she is falling for him. hard and very fast.
1. Chapter 1

**HEY Guys, I'm new at this, I started writing the story a while ago and I decided to ask a couple of tell me what you think.**

**Bettina is made up but it's my best friend's name, pretty cool yea?**

**Love, peace and Chicken grease.**

**#-#**

I woke up when my 6 year old sister jumped on my bed. She could barely walk from all her clumsiness but boy could she be annoying with those little legs of hers.

I knew she wouldn't give up and when I looked at the clock it was only 6:00, way to early to get up. My mom died at her birth so, I was in charge because my dad was always drunk or missing.

I got up with a 'humph' and she fell on the bed. "What is it you want Bettina?" I asked a bit irritated. "I wanna play." She said.

"Well, I guess I'm up so, let's go play." I said. I walked out my door and right next to me I could still hear my brother sleeping, the kid snored worse than anyone I had ever heard.

No way was he going to snooze while I need to keep this little monster occupied. I open his door flippantly, not to wake him just yet but when I saw his face I decided to let him sleep.

His tussled brown hair sprawled all over the pillow. I would never ever agree that I thought it but my brother was really fine-looking, well of course we were twins but he was always the better looking one.

He looked tired and it was Saturday after all. I closed the door again and walked with Bettina, hand in hand downstairs.

On the couch my dad Charlie was passed out in one of the single chairs. His brown, oily fuzz hair and disgusting face was not a nice sight.

Bettina looked scared when she saw him. How could a child be afraid of her own father?

"Bettina, what about we play at Alice and Edward for a bit?" I asked. She laughed and nodded. She liked them just as much as I did.

I wrote Jasper a letter telling him where we were and stuck it on his door. Then I decided to take a quick bath and I helped Bettina afterwards.

I looked out the window into Edward's bedroom and saw he was awake and sitting on his bed, already dressed and like I knew him on his way here.

Jasper was still asleep and it was about 7:00 now. We hurried out the house passing the snoring gunch on the couch. We walked to their front yard and to the door.

Having a best friend for a neighbor was truly a great thing. We could climb through each other's windows when we wanted to. We did that, frequently.

Without even knocking, Edward opened the door. He was the most beautiful creature I ever saw. His dark brown hair, witch was messy on top of his head and his green eyes witch could burn a whole into you.

He was long and lean and gay. I reminded myself. Next stop: Gay Ville, Population: My best friend Edward.

I laughed at my thought and when he smiled at us, his perfect white marbles glared back.

Bettina was getting impatient.  
"Edward, I came to play because my dad is drunk again, so squeeze Me." she said pushing him away to get to Alice.

I went in after him and we sat on the couch. Alice came downstairs with Bettina in her arms.

She was also very beautiful; she looked almost exactly like Edward, except she had short black hair hugging her face and a more feminine build.

I imagined Edward with long hair and started to laugh. "What's wrong, why are you laughing?" He asked amused.

"Well I actually thought about you with long hair." I said and muffled another laugh. "I'm not that gay, geez." He said and smiled.

He didn't act gay though and to be honest a lot of girls still wanted him and threw them onto him. We would just laugh afterwards.

He never had a girl or guy before and I could swear sometimes he wasn't gay. We would act like a couple actually. We did everything except of course for the kissing and such.

"Wow young lady, you're getting to heavy." Edward said putting Bettina down in front of me and she immediately jumped into my lap, her long curls waving around her face.

She got my mothers curls and so did I. "What have you been feeding her?" She asked, pretending to hold her back when she sat on the ground in front of us?

"Well at least someone is feeding her." I said and smiled. Alice and Edward knew very well what the uhm . . . situation was at home.

Since my mom died, Jasper and I took care of Bettina. I bet he didn't even know what her name was.

He started to drink long before my mom was pregnant with Bettina. Then afterwards he resented us or something.

He has nothing to do with us. We take care of everything in the house. When my mom died she left us a lot and I mean a lot of money so at least we didn't suffer.

"Bells it's okay, you know were here right?" Edward reassured me. I didn't notice I started to cry.

"Yea, its just hard practically being an orphan." I shrugged. Bettina buried her face in my neck and hugged me tight.

"Hey can I leave Bettina here for a sec? I just want to check up on Jasper." I asked.

"Sure, Bettina lets play hide and seek. Bells, tell your sexy brother to get his cute butt over here." Alice said and winked.

I laughed and walked out the house. Those two were dating since they were in diapers.

I opened the door and soon enough Jasper and my dad was fighting in the living room. "You can't be drunk all the time; you should take care of us." He said pointing a finger at my dad.

My dad rushed to close the space between them. This was getting out of order.

My dad didn't mind slapping me around a bit every now and then. Why me, I didn't know but he wouldn't really touch Jasper. I walked closer to them.

I hated the fighting. We would always watch a movie and I would think that the lovly family you see on the tv, I wanted to be that family.

I wanted to go and buy Christmas presents and surprise my dad with a nice dinner.

I just wanted a family again, I wanted to be a kid for once.

"Dad, Jasper can you please stop this?" I asked. I wasn't mean at all. Jasper hated my dad for what he was and to be honest so did I but I didn't like confrontation.

Sometimes Edward would say its my motherly instinct. I wanted to keep Bettina happy so I would be the lesser one.

I was suddenly very glad that I left Bettina with Alice. "Jasper maybe you should calm down." I said putting my hand on his shoulder.

He didn't look what he was doing and he slammed my hand of his shoulder with such a force it landed against the wall, next to the couch.

I could feel it burning and almost see it swelling. Then he looked at me with hurt. "It's okay Jasper, its okay." I said hugging him.

Jasper was scared, every day he prayed he would never become his father. Now he would blame himself for months.

When I released him my dad lifted his hand and hit Jasper so hard he fell over the couch, lying very, very still. "Jasper. . . " I broke of rushing to him but my dad stopped me and I felt a blow to my face. This was nothing new I thought before I closed my eyes.

xxx

Beep, beep, beep.

What the hell was that irritating noise and where did it come from. I didn't remember falling asleep. I didn't put an alarm on my phone. I don't even know where I was.

Beep, beep, beep.

Urg, I hate that sound, maybe it was my alarm, if I could just find it. After I struggled to get out of the sleep I heard the terrible sound again. This time I heard something other than that.

Beep, beep, beep.

"Edward, I want to talk to her why wouldn't she wake up." I heard a small voice in the distance.

"Honey, I'm sure she will wake up soon enough." I heard a bigger, stronger voice.

"Bells open your eyes." The same voice said.

Then like he said, I tried to open my eyes but they were very swollen. I saw Edward first, beautiful as ever and then Alice with a very worried Bettina on her lap.

I shrugged at the pain as I breathed in and out. Why was I in the hospital? Think Bella think, Owh, yea my dad.

Jasper, oh so help me if that thing did something to my brother. "Where . . . Jasper" I said and turned to my side but turned right on my back again.

"He's in the room next to you." I heard the strong voice again it was definitely Edward. I could feel his hand on mine.

Later that day, I woke up and everything was clear. Al the sudden Edward and Bettina stormed into my room. "Jupy . . . Bells I missed you." Bettina said and ran to the side of my bed.

"What, how long have I been out?" I asked surprised. "Ten days actually, and Jasper woke up yesterday but his in for a scan now, just to check if everything is fine and all." Edward explained.

Wow, ten days. I couldn't even remember getting here. Bettina looked like she was thinking very hard with her little eyebrows pulled together. "What's wrong honey?" Edward asked her when he saw it to. "I want to touch her." She said pointing at me.

"Okay well hop on." I said. He restrained her. "Bettina, really I rather you didn't because you'll hurt her." He said. Instead she climbed into Edwards arm and he placed her on the bed next to me at a safe distance.

"Urg what happened?" I asked. "We were kind of worried about you and when my mom came home we left Bettina with her to see if you were alright." He said.

I nodded for him to continue. "Then we heard your dad's car screeching out of the driveway." He said. "After that we practically ran to your house.

We found Jasper lying on the floor behind the flipped couch and you in the corner in a much worse state." He finished.

Thank goodness Bettina didn't see that. "Yea, they told me you were hurt and then I stayed with Esme till they came to fetch me to visit you and Jasper." Bettina added.

These people were closer to us then my family. I shrugged and then Jasper came into the room, with Alice pushing him.

Oh no. "Oh gosh, please tell me I'm thinking wrong." I said closing my eyes. "You can open your eyes Bells it's just the hospital rules." Jasper said getting up.

Oh thank the lord for that. "When can I go home?" I asked. Just when I asked the doctor came through the door and answered my question. "Well about another week." He said writing on his board thingy. "Why that long?" I asked confused.

"Because of all the broken bones" He said. "What broken bones?" I asked again. Then his beeper went off. "I would love to be in the beautiful ladies company but they need me. Explain to her please." He said patting Edward on the back. "Bella, where to start" He said examining me with his beautiful green eyes and touching me with his tanned skin.

Stop it idiot, his gay. I mentally scowled myself. "You broke your right hip and a couple of ribs. You have a fractured skull and bruises where you didn't break your bones." He laughed and I laughed with him.

"Then you also broke your left hand, but Jasper explained why." He said. I looked at Jasper and he shot an apologetic glance. "Hey Jasper, it wasn't your fault." I said and he smiled, so fake.

"Well, no wonder I'm gonna be here for another week." I said snorting. "Did you seriously just snort?" He asked. "Sorry, yea I did." I said and laughed again.

This time everybody joined in. With all the commotion, Bettina fell asleep by my side, slightly gripping my waist. "She looks like an angel. She looks so peaceful." I said.

"She looks like you, beautiful." Edward said and I blushed. She did actually a lot; we had the same pale skin, beautiful brown curls and long, lean figures.

"Well, well aren't we getting al up in Bella's grill?" Alice laughed. Just then a nurse came in and smiled at me.

"Guys you need to get out, visiting time is over and Jasper you need to sign the release forms." She said.

"Please, can she stay?" I asked pointing at Bettina at my side. "Only, if she is family." She said. "Yes, she's my little sister." I said and the nurse went out pushing everyone but her through the door.

Falling in love, it's such an easy thing to do . . . Birds can do it, bees can do it let's get to it, let's fall in love. I thought while I waited for my brother and friends to pick me up from the hospital.

A week passed, terribly slow and I was ready to go home. I had a cast on my hand and a bandage across my stomach to keep my ribs from throbbing. I had this feeling inside witch sent my guts in a knot when I thought about Edward.

Maybe it was love. I did love him but like a - your – my – best – friend - / - brother – kind of love. I thought and laughed. He was very good to me since we met our first day of kinder garden.

The earliest memory I could thought of was the two of us in the sandpit and then a guy called Jason threw ants down my shirt. I remembered how Edward punched him and helped me to get the ants out.

Then he got kicked out and I remembered crying until my mom moved me to where he was. Then I remember when my mom died and he crawled through my window to comfort me.

I knew he was gay by then. I remembered I had kissed him once, only pecking. We were about twelve and it was a dare but it was very good. He told me he was gay when he was sixteen.

His mom and sister didn't know until last year when we were seventeen. They didn't reject him; instead Alice was thrilled to share girl stuff with him.

She was wrong though and he never acted gay at all. Not even wearing tight close. I laughed when I imagined him in a tight jean and tight spaghetti top. Of course he would look like a Model in it. "Do you need a penny for your thoughts?" Edward brought me back to reality.

"Nope I sell them for a dollar. "I joked but I jumped at his voice, which was very close to my ear and I blushed.

"Oh, I'm sorry I startled you, honey." He said and leaned away. "It's okay; I just let my mind wonder." I said.

"And to where did your mind wonder, if I may ask?" He asked and took my hand. "Well actually about us, since we were little and such." I said and smiled.

"No explanation needed." He said. Bettina turned at my side and opened her beautiful brown eyes.

Since a week ago she slept with me every night. She would go home at day and come back in the night. She was just as stubborn as me and when she set her mind to something, there was no stopping her.

So she had her way and slept next to me every night. Not that I complained at all, she was technically my mom's but I sometimes wonder if she thought about me as a mom.

Since I did everything for her but she exchanged the favor by smiling and being grateful for everything we did for her.

"I guess it's time to go Bells, unless you want to stay." He said and smiled, clearly making a joke.

"I think, I will, I like it here, no goofs to make fun of me." I joked. "Goof, hey that hurts." He said touching his heart.

"I'm sure it would have, if you had one." I joked again. I got of the bed slowly and Edward took Bettina in his arms while he swung my bag over his shoulder.

He was so . . . gay. I had to remind myself again. Falling in love, it's such an easy thing to do, birds can do it bees can do it, let's get to it, let's fall in love. I sang in my head while I got pushed through the hospital door to the porch.

I got up slowly and limped to the car. Most of my injuries were better, except for the hand and ribs. I got in front after strapping Bettina in at the back.

We didn't drive to fast because we didn't have to rush. Apparently my dad hasn't been seen since the accident so we were now, thanks to the Cullen's permanently living there.

They had a very big house and a lot of extra rooms; even with me and my brother they had two spares. We arranged for Bettina to sleep in my room.

When we got to the house we got out and went in immediately. We went to his room first and then to mine.

It was a beautiful, big room with lime green and silver everywhere. My favorite colors in. I had a double bed and across from the room was a single bed, pushed up against the window.

It was beautiful and Bettina jumped out of Edward's hands to jump on her bed. We both Laughed. Esme came into the room after knocking.

"Bettina, would you like to go get you some clothes and afterwards ice cream?" She asked. Bettina ran to her. "Yes, can I Bells, please?" She asked. "Sure you can but you better behave." I warned.

I never really knew why she asked me if she could do stuff. I was more her mother then I realized.

"Okay, bye." She said. "Bye, we won't be too long." She said. "Hey what about we get ice cream to, you know that nice Italian place?"

He asked. "Owh sounds nice." I said. "I need a quick bath though." I said. "Okay I'll wait in my room." He said and I nodded. I tried to hurry as much as I could.

I wrapped the towel around me and went into my room. I decided that I didn't need the bandage around my waist anymore, it wasn't that bad and . . . oh, I forgot my bags in his room. I peeked into the hallway and the ghost was clear.

I rushed to his room and he wasn't there. I stood in the doorway, wondering where he was and then a cold finger touched my shoulder. I shuddered and turn around and then my towel tripped me and I fell on top of Edward.

This was so embarrassing. I held onto the towel for dear live. Edward just laughed and helped me up. "I'm sorry; I forgot the bag into my room." I said. "Well, it's okay. I'm gay remember." He said and swung his hand like a gay person.

If only you weren't. I thought. What, no. he looks so nice standing there. Bella, get a grip. I said.

"Why the heck are your hands so cold?" I asked him, "I went downstairs to get some ice to eat, sorry." He said.

Good explanation. He always ate ice, so weird and freaky. "I need to get dressed." I said.

"Okay be right back." He said and jogged downstairs. I got dressed and went downstairs. I had a plain skinny jean and t shirt. He was sitting on the couch and watching SpongeBob.

"Wow, real mature Eddie." I laughed getting down the stairs. He turned the television of and walked to me.

"No calling me Eddie, Smella." He said in a fake whinny voice. "wanna watch SpongeBob, I call you Eddie." I shrugged.

"You look good, let's go." He said and we walked to his car, his eyes lingered. How strange Edward.

The ice cream parlor wasn't far and we got there quickly. We ordered and decided to go for a walk. It was nice walking and eating the ice cream.

I could relax with my best friend. No worries for a change.

Edward had some ice dream on his nose and I started to laugh. "What now?" He asked.

"Well, there is ice cream on your nose." I said. He wiped his nose but still missed it. "I got it." I said wiping it off with my thumb.

"Bella," He asked. "Yes?"

"I dare you to kiss me." He said. "Why would I do that, you're gay?" I asked.

"Because I never kissed a girl before and I want to know how it feels." He said again.

"Well that unfair, I haven't kissed a guy . . . straight guy either but you would be kissing a straight girl." I said.

"I just want to know." He said pulling me tighter. "Fine but I swear no tong or I'll bite you." I warned he laughed and leaned closer.

I kissed him and the electric sparks flew through me. It was like nothing I ever felt. The world stopped spinning for a millisecond.

He seemed to enjoy it because he placed his hands in my hair. I did the same and it got even warmer than it was.

This wasn't supposed to happen. I t felt like hours and then he released me, probably to get some breath. There was tongue involved though.

"Wow . . . I . . . this was . . . wow." He said and waved his hand through his hair. It pained me to say it. "So, now you know. See nothing, lets head home, it's late." I said.

He nodded in amusement and we drove home in silence.

**AN: I just want to know if I should continue with my story**. **Please tell me. **


	2. Chapter 2

**This is one of my favorite parts. My best friend doesn't know I am showing u this. Hope u like.**

**Love, peace and chicken grease  
#-#**

He belongs with me.

It was a month after the raging kiss and neither of us spoke about it again. It was also school again and I was healed accept for the wrist brace. I just got out of the shower and I got my underwear from my drawer and my I pod.

I turned it to loud and sang to the words of 'don't trust me' a song from 30h3.I was singing and playing air guitar, not that there was a guitar solo in there, but I used my imagination.

That was until I saw Edward standing in the doorway laughing his guts out, holding his perfect stomach. Oh, please kill me now.

"Edward, turn around douche bag." I laughed.

"Oh, douche bag hey?" He asked and I knew I was in trouble. Luckily Bettina was in Alice's room with Jasper getting ready so I jumped on her bed.

He followed and when he got closer I jumped with my feet tripping and I fell on the ground pulling Edward on top of me.

"Edward, this doesn't look good, I'm half naked and on top of you." I said and started to get up. "I'm half naked too." He said. He only had his boxer on. "Well, you're a guy." I shrugged sitting on the bed. "Yes and you're a girl." He said.

"Now that's sorted out. Please get dressed, you disgust Me." he laughed and wrinkled his nose. I looked at him and threw him with a sneaker. I missed.

He walked to his room and I quickly got dressed. I walked to Alice and Jasper. "Wow, you look beautiful Bettina. Are you ready for your first day of big school?" I asked.

She nodded and jumped into my arms. "Why are you wearing that?" Alice asked. "What's wrong with my clothes?" I asked offended.

"Let me just get away first, I'm checking on Edward." Jasper said and slid out the door.

"Listen, I don't need fashion advice." I said. I wasn't dressed that bad, I wore a red t - shirt and black jeans with my Levis. It really didn't look that bad.

"Maybe you should try wearing something sexy." She said. She of course had tight, light blue, skinny jeans on and a top that showed cleavage. She didn't look slutty but sexy and she could totally pull it off. I looked like a man, nuf said.

I shrugged and walked out the door. She left me alone; I guess she could see she was hurting me, or something.

I walked downstairs and everybody waited for us. I got in Edward's red Audi with Bettina in the back and Alice got into Edward's car. We both got the exact car for our sweet sixteen, for each other though.

Mine was a dark blue and his silver. It wasn't a big car but it was the best. It was also an Audi but it was a different one then Edward.

First we dropped Bettina at pre-school and after I walked her to her class and making sure she was fine, we drove to our school.

Brits high, it wasn't big about a thousand people. We got just in time to get to assembly. I stood there, arm's crossed and wondering if the feeling would ever fade.

"Listen are you listening, the seniors better change their attitude." The head master growled. "Uhhhhh . . . I said, listen." He stuttered again, the girls started too laughed and the boys mimicked him and started to Uhhhhh all at once.

We laughed even more. After he got so mad he couldn't control himself, he dismissed us and we were of to homeroom. I sat next to Edward, just chatting about random stuff. "So, let's play random questions." He suggested.

"Fine but you start and you have to answer it to." I said. "Okay, well who do you like?" He asked.

That was so unexpected. I couldn't lie, could I? Yes. "Well, no one actually, It's your turn." I said. "Well, I-" He started but then the bell rang, thank goodness, I had to escape. I practically ran to Math.

We met again at lunch and took our usual spot at the steps. I had an apple but before I could do something with it, it got flicked out of my hand, into the hands of the very devilish Edward.

"Well, well, what did I do to get a visit from the devil?" I asked sarcastic. He smiled and took a bite. "Goof-" I said but he leaned in closer until our heads touched.

"Boo," He said and it wasn't really scary. "Urg, you are annoying me." I said. He leaned back. "Boy, you're pissed, sorry I'll get out of your face." He said and walked away.

I didn't mean to do it but it was so annoying when he was that close and I couldn't do anything. I guess I should just let him go. "So, are we all going to prom?" I asked.

My best friend Alice, Jasper and my other friends Rose and Emmett chocked. I usually hated stuff like prom. "Yea, oh, Jupy-" Alice said, jumping up and down. "We need to shop, we have a week." She continued.

After school we drove to Pre School in silence. I hated us not talking but he didn't even look at me. He did look sad in a way. As soon as we got there I went to pick Bettina up. "How was your day?" I asked her.

"Very fun, my teachers name is Jenna and we colored today." She said. She sounded very excited about it. I was glad she got along with the teachers.

She jumped in at the back and we drove home in the dead silence again. As soon as I got to their home, my phone rang. "Hello Bella speaking." It was an unknown number. "Hey this is Heidi from Brits hospital." She said.

"Hi, how can I help you?" I asked politely. I've been there quite a lot. "Well, it's about your dad. I'm sorry miss, he came in this morning. We tried anything but he didn't make it. Will you come to see him?" She asked. _Thank goodness his dead._ I thought.

_What are you thinking Bella His _your_ dad? I don't care he abused us. Now he would never get to us again, or Bettina. _

It shocked me that I was so heartless but I was worry free again. I had nothing to worry about, at all. I gave her the number of his sister and made myself go and break the news to Jasper.

"Jasper, can I talk to you real quick?" I asked as I entered Alice's room. "Yea, come in." He said. Bettina wouldn't find out just yet, she was eating downstairs with Edward.

"I'm just going to say it . . . dad is dead." I said. He shot up and looked at me. "You know what." He said walking to me. "Good-" He said and walked past me, probably to go and eat.

I went downstairs after I calmed myself. Edward and Bettina were watching SpongeBob. "Bettina do you have homework?" I asked.

"Nope, not yet" She said without looking away from the TV. I sat next to Edward, didn't dare to look at him. "What are we doing today?" I asked.

"Bettina has a play date remember, she's sleeping over." Esme said, barging into the door with to many groceries in her hands. We all jumped. Everybody grabbed a bag and I was left with the flour.

I carried it to the kitchen and fell in the chair, with the flour on the platform in front of me. _What an ashole._ I thought to myself.

Someone was behind me and before I could look Edward threw ice in my back. I cringed and jumped on the table to get away. I had the flour, what a good idea. I opened it behind my back and grabbed a hand full, throwing it in his face.

He stepped away but grabbed a hand full before he did. It came my way and I felt the flour everywhere and my hair covered in white. I saw him taking the bag.

Oh, now I'm in trouble. "Ouch, wait, I think I got flour in my eye." I said, not really though. "Let me see, Bella." He said coming closer. He took my face in his hand and brought it up to his. Then he blew on my face and the flour disappeared.

_His breath was so nice and warm and smelled like honey. Gay, Urg, his gay for crying out loud._ I thought. My plan felt so cruel right now but o well.

I grabbed the bag and dumped it over his head. He shuddered and accidently pulled me with him when he fell on the ground. For some reason he tried to grab the faucet but failed, leaving the water on at full blast. Of course we fell to the ground and were now full of flour and oh water.

We were full of the sticky, icy goo. "Hey you know what, we need milk and eggs and we can make pancakes." He joked.

"Well let's not wait." I said and got up as fast as I could to run to the fridge. I got two eggs, the only two left, thank goodness. "Oh, Edward" I teased but I didn't expect him appearing with a carton of milk he got out of the bag he carried into the house.

He ran to me and I jolted him with eggs. He ended up throwing me with a liter, worth of milk. Now, I was floured, stick and eggy. We both laughed at each other.

"Well beter clean up before your mother gets here." I laughed. He grabbed me and ran with me to the back yard. "What you doing?" I asked. "Well, beter get us cleaned first" but before I could ask how he jumped into the pool with me in his arms. It was kind of nice and warm.

It was Friday, finally and tomorrow was the dance. I took a hot shower and was now sitting on my carpet, waiting for Edward.

Esme had a date and Alice begged Jasper to go to dinner, so we were all alone. I finished my homework and he knocked on my door, coming in with Romantic sweets.

It was our favorite. We ate and told jokes. It took us so long to clean up it was about eight. "I need to tell you something." He said suddenly being very serious. "What, you can tell me." I said, taking his hands.

"I think . . . no wait . . . I know . . . Fine, I'm not gay." He said. I swallowed about five sweets and started to choke. He hit me on the back and when I calmed down I was shocked.

"Why now, what changed your mind?" I asked. I couldn't believe it. "A girl changed my mind." He said._ A girl, oh bad news, there was a girl. One that changed his whole life she better take care of his heart and mine for that matter._

"Wow, who is she?" I thought. "I actually know her from way back." he said. "Tell me, tell me." I said. "Not now k but I promise later." He said.

"Okay fine, I lied to you today, I do like someone but I'll tell you when you tell me." I said. "That is a deal." He said kissing my hand. "Wait you're not gay, you saw me in my underwear Urg gross." I said and hit him with a pillow. He laughed.

"It was kind of nice, if I have to say so myself." He teased. "Okay so, I can't believe you're straight. So I guess were not going to be the 'none existent couple' anymore. " I said.

That was going to be hard to see him, kissing girls. Well at least I was his first kiss.

EPOV

"_Okay so, I can't believe you're straight. So I guess were not going to be the 'none existent couple' anymore. "She said._ Well I was actually hoping for so much more than that. You'll find out soon enough. I thought and got warm inside.

BPOV

I could see he didn't want to answer. "Well, do you think you love her?" I asked again.

"I do, I know it." He said confident. "Well, she better give you all her love."_Look into those beautiful eyes and know she's so lucky to have him._ I couldn't tell him that part.

I said and smiled. Tear were near. _I bet she's beautiful I thought. _I grabbed a notepad and started writing my thoughts on the page. _He belongs with me._ I said again.

He looked at me intensely and all I could do is fake a smile so he won't see the pain. I couldn't endure this anymore, I had to leave.

"I'm gonna go okay. I need to do something." I said and got up. "Night, sleep tight" He said. "Yea night" I managed.

As soon as I was out in the hallway, I started to cry. It was the wrong place of course because Alice stood there in her doorway, staring wide eyed at me.

I just walked next door but she followed me. "Are you okay Bella? Is this about your father?" She asked. I guess I could use that excuse. "Well, no actually I, come sit." I said pointing to the space beside me.

"I'm in love with Edward, for a long time now and tonight he told me he's not gay. I couldn't believe it, I dreamed that he would say it for so long but then he told me he was in love with a girl, no he told me he loved her." I said crying into my hands.

"Bella, you know it's just our friends that knew he was gay." She said. "He came to me a week ago and told me he had feelings for a girl. I told him that couldn't be. He said he didn't believe it, how can he be straight right but he said he decided, she was more precious to him then anyone." She continued.

"By the way, you should fight for what you want. Nothing that's worth something is free." She said and winked at me. After a very long discussion and 'I'll kill you if you tell him.' She left me alone with my thoughts.

I grabbed my guitar and played with the cords. The tears flew down my cheeks now and landed on my guitar. This wasn't how I planned it. It reminded me of _Speak now, or forever hold your peace._ I thought and smiled. Well I should have known.

My life took a turn for the worse. I thought of that kiss, that wonderful, mind blowing, excellent. _Oh now I'm out of describing words._ Well anyway that kiss Life – altering is a good word to. I fell asleep dreaming of a very straight Edward.

The next morning I woke up with a head ach and puffy eyes. Well, suits me right, crying my eyes out for a crush. If only this was a crush. I went downstairs after I showered and found a note on the fridge.

_He there sis, I went to the Zoo with Alice and Bettina. She was bugging us and we couldn't wait for you. _

_Love_

_Jasper_

I smiled at the thought of them in the zoo, Bettina running like a wild child. That reminds me I wanted to watch wild child. I saw another note.

_There weren't ingredients for pancakes, I wonder why, went to get Breakfast._

_Edward._

Owh how sweet, what is it with people and their notes? I watched TV until Edward got home. He bought coffee and doughnuts.

We sat on the couch and ate. I didn't want to face him. I wanted nothing to do with him, as of right now. He gazed at me and I looked up. "What" I asked sharp. "What's wrong?" He asked. "Nothing, why are you asking"

"Now that's an assault. I know you better than that Bella. You have been crying." He said taking my chin in his hand. I couldn't look away now. "I'm just tired, that's all." I said.

"Yea well you did play guitar until who knows how late." He said and smiled. "You can hear me?" I asked and blushed. "Yes, tell me is it because you miss your mom?" He asked. I shrugged. That was a very big reason and when tears started to stream he took it as a yes.

"She's never far-" He said touching my heart with his hand. "She looks just like you, those beautiful brown eyes. Your fantastic curls, that hugs your fabulous face and that awesome blush." He said, touching my cheeks.

I couldn't stand it; I decided to tell Edward the one secret I held from him, the one who kept me up at night. He interrupted me though. "You know what, were the two most boring people I know. It's Saturday." He said. I laughed, good thing to start with.

"Yea, well what can we expect right, we still play for the V – team." He laughed. No, why now, why did God hate me? I guess he saw the look on my face.

"Please, tell me your still a -" I interrupted him there. "Technically, I'm not." I said. Then he got red, not blushing, fury. "How could you?" He slid away from me to the furthest side of the couch, like I was some disease.

"Edward, let me explain please." I begged. He wasn't with me; he was in the remote future or distant past. I could remember it clearly.

It was my sixteenth birthday and we were sitting on the swings alone. We were in an in depth discussion about life and love and somehow we ended up at sex.

I don't know how we could be so honest but let's just say we promised some weird things that night. It all changed to me when he told me he was gay about three months later. Although I knew somehow we would end up together.

"I do, I do remember it, so clearly but if you'll listen to me." I said. "So now you wane tell me the gory details too. Keep them and stay away." He said, walking to his room.

"Please, I just need to say something." I said running after him but I tripped on the stair. He turned around and didn't even try to help me. He glared at me and the saying if looks could kill, came to mind.

"Who was it?" He asked and the question blew me away. Finally I could say it. I got up and brushed along my ribs. He came closer and took my chin in his hand, very forcefully. Then my best friend had the look of a man I once knew, a man I hated, my father.

I could see him from inside of Edward and I wanted to get away. Was he going to start hitting me too? I closed my eyes and tears streamed down my face. I opened them again and he was in the same position, very close to my face and his free hand balled up into a fist.

Oh no, brace for impact. "Tell me who it was." He said and I couldn't find my voice to answer. "I said, well never mind, I can't even look at you." He said. We were at his room now.

He slammed the door in my face and at the top of my longs I yelled into the door. "CHARLIE. . ." And ran to my room. I closed it and went to the bathroom to take a warm shower. Nobody knew this.

It was just me and Edward and tomorrow, I'll move back into my house and die alone. The girl who seemed unbreakable . . . broke, the girl who seemed so strong . . . crumbled. The girl who always laughed it off . . . cried and the girl who never stopped trying . . . finally gave up. I thought while I fell asleep.

EPOV

I couldn't believe it was him; the man that called him her father did that. I thought it was her fault. I can't believe I did that, how much worse did I make it?

I need to see if she was okay. I needed to tell her how sorry I was. I walked to her room and opened the door. It was day but she was sound asleep. She didn't sleep at all last night, she needed the rest. She looked so beautiful. She had the face of innocence, a face of an angel, a personality of a dreamer and a smile that hid more pain than you could ever imagine.

I thought she was gorgeous. I snuggled next to her and held her tight. She would have wanted me too. I drifted in and out of sleep for a while.

BPOV

I woke up in Edward's arms and all I could do is wish it wouldn't end. I turned around and snuggled deeper into his chest.

After a couple of minutes I got up and he was still asleep. He seemed to have forgiven me; I knew I forgave him for what he said. I would do the same.

To think he will soon kiss someone with those beautiful lips and hold someone in his arm gave me another round of tears. I didn't know what to say, this wasn't supposed to happen.

I didn't want him to find out like this and why did Edward act like that. I couldn't believe I found myself in this mess.

He made me believe my dream could be a reality. He made me see that life was worth living. He showed me that the words I speak can change my life forever. I thought and shrugged. I didn't know what to do now. I was lost.

I went to the bathroom and slammed myself into the wall, sliding on my back till I sat on the ground and soon I was lying on the cold floor alone.

**Flashback**

**I sat in the living room with my book in my lap, reading always soothed me. I had a black eye from the last time Charlie came home drunk. I got the book for my birthday about three months ago from Edward.**

**I gave him a book as well just two weeks before that. I was deep in my book that my heart stopped when Charlie was standing beside my bed. He had a very mock expression on his face. I placed my book on the end table and got up.**

**I started walking away from him. "Where do you think, you're going?" He asked. "Nowhere actually, maybe I'll take Bettina to the park." I suggested.**

**He had other plans though. "Listen to me you." He said grabbing a fist full of my hair. I winched when he didn't let go. "You aren't going anywhere." He said and threw me against the wall. I got up and ran upstairs.**

"**Oh, bad move. Haven't you watched enough horror movies to know you shouldn't run upstairs?" He said and let out an evil laugh. I knew it. I was screwed now. I ran to my room and he was there very quickly. . . **

**I had to get away, I didn't want to remember. I winched and turned when I couldn't do anything else. "NO, please, please, leave me alone." I yelled at the top of my lung.**

**End**

I woke up because of the screeching scream. I sat up straight and started to cry. My hair was sticking to my face and I was shivering like crazy.

I couldn't believe it was just a dream. It was so real. I started to cry and sob. My throat burned, probably from the scream. I didn't realize it before I got up that Edward stood in the doorway, with horror on his face.

He didn't know what to do and he was shaking from anger. I closed my eyes still crying and I felt strong arms holding me, I shrugged into his chest. I opened my eyes slowly to look at him.

I didn't expect this to happen. When I looked at Edward, I saw my dad. It was Charlie, his unshaved face and his evil blue eyes. Was I going crazy? What was happening?

"Let, go, and please leave me." I said. I struggled until I was out of his grip. I ran out the room, out the door, passing Alice, Jasper and Bettina on the way. I ran into the woods and stopped when I got tired.

I fell on the ground between a lot of trees and an old, dead log.

What was I going to do? What did I just do? I saw my dad in the loving Edward. He would never do that. I couldn't believe what I did.

He must have felt so bad. He must wonder if he hurt me. I looked up at the big oak tree and I started to cry. On the bottom just below the first trunk, I saw the names carved into the tree.

It was our tree, I could remember how I came here with Edward when one of us wasn't happy or felt sad. I ran right to the tree and now I will run right back to Edward and tell him I love him.

Before I could do that I heard footsteps. "Bella, are you here?" I heard Jasper asked.

"Yea, around the oak" I said and waited for him to appear. He sat next to me and I placed my head on in his lap. "I couldn't help it . . . What does Edward think. I can't believe what I did. I was so mean Jasper."

I said but he only held me tight against him. "Bellie, he understands okay. It's alright. Shhh" He said.

Another thing came to mind. "I'm so sorry I didn't tell you, I knew you would get in a fight with dad and I didn't want you to get hurt." I said.

I knew what my dad would have done to him. I knew what he did to me. "It's okay Shhh, now that I know, I'm gonna help you through it okay." He said patting my hair.

I was lying in my bed after I had the talk with Jasper. I was glad it was out. I didn't talk to Edward yet. I couldn't face him.

I was lying on my side and snuggled under my covers. I could hear Bettina and Alice playing in the other room.

I felt a warm hand on my shoulder and I really didn't want to back away but I jumped and sat up straight. I saw it was Edward and he was pressed against the wall with a horrid face.

"I . . . I thought you were asleep. I'm so sorry, I'll leave." He said and opened the door.

"No, please stay here. I just had a fright, I didn't expect that. "I said and he relaxed. He sat on the bed not touching me.

I took his hand and he fell into the pillow next to me. The cover was at our feet. He still didn't touch me except for my hand. I pulled him closer and rested my face in his chest. He smelled like honey and rose.

He pulled me tighter and I shivered, not because of the touch but because of the cold. He pulled the cover over us and tucked me in. I fell asleep in his strong arms and I was in heaven.

It felt like I was on a high. He kissed my hair and I wanted to kiss his lips so bad.

**Flashback**

**I was sitting on the couch with Bettina and watched a children movie. She sat on my lap and suddenly the door slammed open and Charlie appeared in the doorway. I looked at Bettina. **

"**Listen; go to your room okay. Don't come out Bettina, stay there. You can watch the movie another time." I said.**

**She nodded and ran as quick as her legs could carry her. My dad came to me then, sitting next to me. He held my gaze. "Why, are you so lazy get up and do something." He said.**

**I got up to do whatever. I already did everything; clean cook did the dirty scum's laundry. Then he grabbed my arm and threw me into the wall. I felt dizzy when I got up. **

"**You know what, I disgrace you. I wish you weren't born. Just wait till Bettina is old enough to lie for herself." He said. I got furious**

**. "You better leave her alone, you dirty f-" I got interrupted when he hit me in the face. "You know why I hit you?" He asked. I shook my head. "Because you remind me of your mother I wish it was you." He said kicking me again.**

**End**

I woke up and the fear left my body when I realized it was just a dream. Edward was rubbing his hands up and down my back. "Shhh it's okay. You had a bad dream." Edward said soothing me. Instead of pushing him back, I pulled him closer and cried until I didn't have tears.

I pulled away from him again to look at his face. "I love you." He said to me. I started to cry again. He loved me because of our friendship. How I wished he loved me like I loved him. "I love you to." More then you'll ever know. I added mentally.

I woke up after a while of dreamless sleeping. It was so relaxing. Edward didn't move since we fell asleep. I was still lying in his arms and he held me tight.

I felt so comfortable, I felt at home. He was snoring lightly and I giggled. I turned to look at the clock and it was 8:00. I left Edward to sleep and went into the bathroom. I got into the shower and let the warm water run over me.

My life was so good; I was on a high but my past kept creeping up on me. I started washing and I felt one of many scars on my thigh, the biggest I had. I got it when Charlie felt abusive and threw me with boiling oil. It was as big as a fist and you could only see it when you were really close, or if you feel it.

Jasper knew about it of course he had to take me to the hospital, but I didn't feel the need to blabber it out to the world. If someone asked I would tell them straight. I always wore underwear that covered it.

Our scares remind us that our past is real. I Thought. I finished and got out, I rushed to the room and Edward was still asleep. I got dressed and went downstairs.

I saw Bettina watching the little mermaid and sat next to her on the couch. She was still in her sleep wear. She snuggled the teddy I bought her on I trip to the mall. "Hey Bettina, what do you want to do today?" I asked.

She looked up with a small devilish look. "I want to shop for clothes because I need to look pretty at school." She said. I needed something as well. "That sounds like a great idea, just you and me." I said.

"We should ask Edward too." She said. She liked him a lot. "Okay, we will but we need to get you ready." Since we were going out I needed to get out of my old jeans. I thought.

She grabbed my hand and we walked upstairs. "Okay, go and get in the tub and I'll come help you now okay." I said.

She nodded and ran into the bathroom. I heard the water run and walked to my room. Edward was gone. I walked onto the bathroom and almost choked when I saw him in only his towel. "We meet again." I said and laughed. He shrugged.

"Hey, turn around." He said. Oh, no my time for fun. "How does it feel to be on the other side of the stick?" I asked and laughed. "Kind of fun actually" He said.

He was bluffing but how much. I walked closer. "Yea, and if I come closer" I asked. "That's even better." He said. "I think your bluffing." I stated. "I'll show you I'm not." He said.

He leaned down and kissed me on the lips. Wow it was breath taking. Better than the park. He didn't stop and I kept kissing him eagerly. He wrapped his hands around my waist and pulled me closer, not breaking the kiss.

He bit my bottom lip softly and I shivered. He pulled away and took a deep breath. "I love you." He said. I knew what he meant. "Edward, do you know how long I waited for this, for you. Even when you were gay, I wanted you." I said and also took a breath to steady myself.

"Just as long as I've been waiting for you" He said and kissed me again. I pulled away this time. "I love you, so much." I said. He nodded and we kissed again. I pulled back, unwillingly.

"I need to take care of Bettina, get dressed she invited you to go shopping." I said and he nodded. Only Bettina could get a guy to go shopping.

I walked to the other bathroom and Bettina was sitting and playing with the bubbles. I quickly washed her hair. I felt so high in the sky, like nothing could touch us.

I was there with Edward. I helped her get dressed in a bright pink sundress with purple flowers and pink sandals. I pulled the comb through her hair and she placed a purple bow in exactly the right place. She had my gift. I thought.

If only I could do it to me and not just to her. I decided to do something about my appearance. I went to the mirror. How could Edward like this? I thought looking in the mirror.

I curled my hair and put on mascara and eyeliner, not too much. I dressed in a grey skinny jean and a black and silver tank top. I wore black shoes.

I didn't feel uncomfortable, to my surprise. I looked okay but still . . . I went downstairs and Edward was sitting with Bettina.

We were in the last store for today and we already had too much bags. Bettina was a hand full. She had the most clothes. I decided to get clothes with I would look good in this time. I also picked up some makeup.

I wanted to get some underwear as well. "I need to go in there, you can stay." I said pointing at a lingerie shop. "No we will go with you and afterwards you're getting us lunch." He said I nodded and with Bettina and his arms we made our way to the shop. I got everything I needed and wanted to pay. "I dare you to pay for this." I told Edward.

His eyes grew wider but I knew he wouldn't be able to leave a dare. "Fine, I'll do it." He said. Bettina came running to us with a very skimpy panty and she was wearing it over her clothes I laughed so hard I almost cried.

"I need this, don't I look fabulous?" She asked. Oh Alice what have you done. "In about ten years, I promise I'll buy it for you." I said. She stuck her tong out and took it off.

She placed it back and I went to Edward at the till. "Hey, I need to buy this." He said. "Who is this for?" The tiller asked.

"It's for-"I cut him off, I could see he was uncomfortable. "It's for me, his girlfriend. Can you just do your job already; I still need to show him how I look in it." I said and grabbed his ass.

He kissed me for a moment and then the tiller was quite. Bettina on the other hand was jumping up and down. When we left the shop Edward smiled. "Thank you, for this." He said.

"It's kind of my fault, I did this to you." I said and smiled. "Bella," he asked. "Yes Edward." I asked. "Will you be my girlfriend?" He asked. I laughed.

"Of course can I ask you something?" I asked. "Yes sure." He said. "Was I the girl you talked about, because you were the guy?" I asked. "Yes, you always were, even when I was gay. I never knew I felt like it." He said and smiled.

I was so high right now. "You know they say, if your this high, you should be afraid of falling." I said. "Bella, we'll fall together, you're not getting out of this that easy." He said.

I took his hand. Falling in love . . . it's such an easy thing to do. Birds can do it bees can do it lets get to it, Lets fall in love. I sang as we approached the pizza place.

**I got a hamster his name is Hitler. I'll put it into the story later. He bites everyone but me. Thanks for all the readers**.  
**PS: I am very random.**

**Hope u liked it**

**The songs are**

**You belong with me – Taylor Swift  
Teardrops on my guitar – Taylor swift  
don't trust me – 30H3**

**Hope I get a couple of reviews. **

**Love**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey me again. I got a great review and I want to thank you guys. Hitler is in the chapter as a Hamster. It's funny and sad but keep on reading!**

**Love peace and chicken grease. **

**#-#**

**Home coming present**

We sat down in the corner and the waiter gave us our menus. "What do you guys want to drink?" She asked us but looked at Edward. She winked at him.

What, she did not just wink at my boyfriend. Oh crap, I was getting over possessive. Edward took my hand and he placed our intertwined hands on the table. Now the waitress was giving me death stares.

"I want a huge, pink milkshake." Bettina broke the silence. "I'll have a coke." Edward said, not looking up. "Make that two, please." I said with venom. She walked up to the kitchen shaking her hips fiercely.

Oh, I wanted to gag. "This was great guys, thanks." I said looking at Edward and then Bettina. "Yes, I enjoyed it a lot." Edward said. Bettina nodded. After the waitress came with the drinks, I ordered the pizza and we waited for a bit.

We were finally finished and paid the bill. We made our way to the car and drove home. It didn't take long because we went to the local mall. In the driveway was an old rusted car, definitely someone with a low salary.

I walked up to the door and was greeted by a sobbing Alice and a cheek stained Jasper. Oh, no what happened, was it Esme? "Jasper is Esme okay?" I asked. He nodded. Then what was this bad?

I saw very tiny, red headed women in the doorway. Her foundation was a color to light and she had way too much lipstick on. She looked at me apologetically. Edward took my hand. "Wait what happened here?" I asked. I picked Bettina up instantly.

"Good day, my name is Brenda, I'm from child services. I have bad news." She said. Oh, no, please. I closed my eyes. _God please, not now. Why can't we stay here? Please, please, please. _ I said before opening my eyes again. Tears streamed down my face and Edward's too.

This was the second time I saw him cry, except for when his dad died. "I'm afraid you guys are going to have to stay here. We are lucky that we found a house where you two could stay together." She said. That didn't help; I wanted to be with Edward. Wait two? "You shouldn't worry, in a few months; you guys can come back, when you're eighteen you can do as you please." She said.

"What about Her?" I asked looking at Bettina. "You see, you can't stay here because Esme here is a single mother and three kids are too much." She said. "I don't understand." I said. "Bettina can stay here, you have to go, or I would have to split you forever, or until she is eighteen." Oh, thank goodness, she would stay here.

"Well, I think she should stay, I need her to be around people she knows." I said. "I agreed" Edward, Jasper and Alice said at the same time. "Where will we go?" I asked.

She then sighed. "The people live in Cape town." She said. What Cape Town. Are these people crazy? "What about the house?" I asked. "We have no choice but to sell it." She said. MY world came crumbling down.

It was exactly two weeks later and I was packing my last things before getting on a plane and seeing my boyfriend, best friend and my sister for who knows how long. We didn't even go to the dance after all.

I cried so much. I loved it here; I was going to leave so much behind. Edward came in and wrapped his hands around my waist. I started to cry again. He pulled me closer and kissed me. I pulled away and sat on the bed. He sat next to me and held my hand. "I need to tell you something." I said. He nodded.

"You know, we won't see each other and out of sight out of mind." I said. He nodded again. "I want you to know that it's okay to see other people. I mean I don't want you to feel you have to stay with me." I said.

I was hysteric now. "I don't want to, I want you. I'll always want you." He said. I nodded. "I won't be far." I said, touching his heart. I did the same he did a while ago. He started to cry again, silent tears welled up in his eyes.

"Well I guess I should go?" I said and got up. "Before you go, I got you something; I want you to think of me." He said. He walked to the door and retrieved a cage and then in his hand was a Hamster nestled inside his palm.

It was a beautiful small dwarf hamster. He was so tiny and I ball of fur. It was perfect. His little nose scrunched and I smiled.

"It's the best Edward, thank you. I already got a name." I said. "What is his name?" Edward asked me. "Hitler, because Hitler was the strongest man He was awful I know but when he wanted something he took it.

I am coming back to you because I want you and I am going to take what I want." He leaned down to kiss me for the last time and we walked outside.

When I got outside everybody was already there and the cab. I got to my knees and gave Bettina a hug.

"I need to go okay; you need to be very good." I said. She started to cry. I got in the cab. I saw Bettina struggling against Alice's grip. "LET GO." She yelled. I cried and buried my face in my hands.

When I arrived at Cape Town, we looked for our new 'parents.' We were turning eighteen in exactly three months two weeks and five days. I could do this. We saw a couple standing in the corner. They motioned for us to go to them.

The guy was handsome vela. He was tall, slim and had brown hair. He had a little stubble and blue eyes with black hair. The women were short and petite. She had long brown hair and she had a heart shaped face. She had brown eyes.

We walked closer and greeted them. "My name is Bella Swan." I said politely but my tone was dead. She smiled at me. "I'm Jasper Swan, her twin." He said and his tone frightened me, was that how I sounded?

"We are Jordan and Brianna Brice, nice to meet you." The man – Jordan said. "We know this is hard, should we go?" They asked.

I nodded and they gestured for us to follow them to the car. I hate them, I hated the car, and I hated the world. I hated everything.

Bettina probably hated me right now. She thought we abandoned her. I got in the car, not saying a word all the way to my 'home.' I got out, seeing a kind of large house. It was brown from the outside. "Let's get you upstairs and unpacked." Brianna said

. We walked upstairs and went into a room she showed me. It was middle sized and I heard Jasper in the other room.

"Thanks, it's nice." I said. She smiled and left. My room was light pink and had white curtains. The carpet was a darker pink and the covers on my- the bed. Jasper came through the door. This was going to be a hard time.

I woke up from a nightmare, or I thought it was until I saw I was in the strange room I dreamt about. It was no nightmare, only a reality.

I got up and walked to the bathroom across the hall. I hurried through the cleaning process and went back to my room. I got dressed in a light skinny jean and a red tank top with red converts. I didn't do too much with my appearance.

I didn't want to look nice or pretty. I went downstairs and instead of the smell of bacon filling the room, I got a bowl out of the cupboard and searched for the cereal. Jasper came downstairs and joined me. The 'parents' were nowhere to be seen.

They probably left early. We drove to school together; our cars were shipped here, at least. I couldn't help but think of my home and my bed and Bettina.

I thought about Edward, he's probably also riding to school. "Bella watch out." Jasper said. I looked just in time to see the squirrel run over the road.

I was lucky to ditch the thing and had my eyes fixed on the road. "I'm sorry, I didn't concentrate." I said, "It's fine; keep your eyes on the road."

We arrived at school just when the bell rang; people were staring at us as we made our way to the class. I got my schedule at the front office.

First period: biology  
Second period: Spanish  
Third period: English  
Fourth period: Math  
Lunch  
fourth period: Science  
Fifth period: Home economics  
Sixth period: Gym

I would follow this schedule for the rest of the year. It was an hour class each period and it was the same day after day. Jasper grabbed the paper.

"Yea, we have Gym and science together." He said, at least two and of course Lunch. I went to my first class as he went to math. The school came out at two, the same as in Brits.

It started at seven. What a schlep. I rushed because I was late. My boots squeaked as I got into the class. I walked up to the teacher. "Hey, I'm new." I said, obviously.

He signed my slip and told me to take a seat next to a brown eyed, blond haired dude. I was uncomfortable. I walked to him and sat down. I didn't look at him. I opened my text book. "Hey my name is Taylor." He said. I was forced to look at him. "I'm Bella, nice to meet you." I said and looked down again. He didn't speak to me again.

After the bell rang I went to my locker. "Hey, wait up." He said. I froze. No, please not one of those. I begged.

"Hey, what's up?" I said keeping it light. "Do you want to sit with us at lunch?" He asked. Good idea, I was beginning to think we were going to sit alone.

"Thanks, can my brother come?" I asked. "Yes of course, see you." He said and disappeared around the corner.

I was on my way to lunch when I bumped into Jasper. I broke down and rested my head on his shoulder. I composed myself enough to speak.

"Hey, we got invited to lunch, wanna come?" I asked. He nodded and we walked to the table where look sat. I sat next to Taylor and Jasper across from me.

We were seven. "Okay this is my friends." He said. "This is Stewart," he said pointing at a dark haired blue eyed beauty. I smiled. "Hey B, what's up?" He asked.

"Hey, nothing yet" I said and he smiled, I smiled to. "Then we have Niel-" He said. Niel had blond hair and brown eyes.

"Hey" He said and smiled. I smiled back. "Next up, is JB" He said showing me another blond haired guy.

"Hey, nice to meet you" He said. I smiled, that's all I could do. "Then, the pretty lady over here is Sara, my girlfriend." He said.

At least we were two. We basically got to know each other at lunch. The rest of the day went bay in a blur. I was invited to a party on Friday night.

The week drifted by slowly and before I knew it I was on my way to the party. I didn't feel like partying and I was on a low because I didn't get a call from Edward yet.

I did tell him to move on but I wanted us to be friends, maybe he hated me to. I got out of the car when we stopped. It was a huge house and everybody was standing at the back. I made my way to Stewart, standing at the pool. "Hey, Bella do you want something to drink?" He asked me.

"Sure, anything is fine." He said. He gave me the drink and we went to sit on the slope behind the house. I fell into the grass and he joined.

"What's your story?" He asked out of the blue. "Well, it's a long one actually." I said. "I have time." He said.

"Okay so, I was abused by my dad and my mom died when my little sister was born. I had to move away from my little sister and from my best friend and Boy friend. I can't wait to go back home." I said.

I didn't mention the rest; we didn't know each other that well. He leaned closer and kissed me. I backed away.

"I just told you I have a boy friend." I said. He shrugged. "I don't care." He said and kissed me again. I couldn't get away he was too heavy.

Thank goodness I had a brother. "Bella, where are you?" Jasper yelled. "I'm here, help me." I said.

Stewart wasn't happy to say the least. He got of me and I practically ran to Jasper. "What's wrong?" He asked me.

I took a deep breath. "He kissed me." I whispered. Jasper let go of me and grabbed Stewart by the shirt. "Touch her again and you'll die." He said. Stewart grinned.

"Is that a threat?" He asked. Jasper gave him a death stare. "Oh, no I don't do threats, that's a promise." He said and we walked away.

The moment I got home I took Hitler and played with him. He ran up my arm and he ended up in my shirt, for a hamster he was really quite and he fell asleep in the crease of my arm. I wanted it to be Edward but for now Hitler will do.

The next Monday we weren't the most popular kids in school and we sat alone at lunch. Stewart didn't dare to look at me.

I smiled and knew that this would end well. At home it wasn't fun, we never even talked to that people and we were still so sad about everything that happened.

Not even once did they try and comfort us. They turned the other cheek.

It was a month since we left. It was still as bad as before.

I ran inside from school with the best news ever. I was moving back, not back home but to another foster home. These people couldn't stand out mopping I guess. I didn't like them either. We got in so many fights over the month that they told us they couldn't do it.

I picked up the phone and dialed Edward's number. "Edward, guess what." I said, not even letting him say hello. "I'm moving back, I'm gonna come home. Were flying tonight and I'm gonna live a street from you." I said. It was only one little street away.

I couldn't stand these people. "What, OMG. I can't believe it." I heard someone yelling from happiness and then my phone died from lack of charge. I didn't care. We were going home.

I wouldn't miss a thing. The so called friends were mean to us and so we didn't get attached to them.

I was with new foster parents now, for a day and I already hated it. I didn't like them either; they were old and didn't talk much.

I got to see Edward at school. I couldn't wait till Monday, to see him. This will also mean, us being together again at school. My phone buzzed.  
_I can't wait to see you.  
Xxx Edward._

I got all nerves and had butterflies. Then the old woman busted into my room. "Who was that?" She asked tapping her ugly shoes on the ground.

"My boy friend Edward" I said. "Well, you can't see him anymore. This wont do you are banned to see him or any other boy." She said and grabbed my phone. I tried to grab it back but she was fast for an old wrinkly lady.

The next day I got up early to get ready for school, afterwards I joined Jasper in the kitchen. I gave her a filthy look.

We got out of the house as soon as we could. As soon as we stopped in the driveway, Jasper walked straight to Alice. Edward almost ran to me and took me into a hug.

I missed him so much. I suffered being without him. He didn't let go he kissed my hair. "I missed you." I mumbled. I started to cry.

"I missed you to. Shhh, its fine and your here now" He said. "About that, we have a problem, I'm not allowed to see you and that thing took my phone." I said. "Oh, well make a plan." He said touching my ear with his lips. I was home.

I was here again, at a high for the third and final time. The bell rang and we went to class, since I was a month away I got a new scedual and it matched Edward's.

I wanted to jump out of my skin. We sat in English and tried very hard not to listen but my thoughts were at Edward and being in his arms, kissing him. He placed his hand on my knee, under the table.

It felt nice and warm. He moved it a little up. I jumped a little and smiled. He was just trying to make fun of me. I blushed at the same time his hand moved slightly, about an inch. My knee jerked into the table and everybody looked at me.

"Everything alright Miss Swan?" The teacher asked. "Yes, just had a cramp in my calf." I said. She smiled and continued. I looked at Edward and he only had a goofy grin on his face.

We rushed to lunch; I couldn't wait to see Alice and my other friends. I walked hand in hand with Edward and everybody stared, even the teachers.

I felt uncomfortable. I sat next to him and Alice. We started chatting about random stuff. "How's Bettina? I missed her so much; I can't wait to see her." I thought. We decided on tomorrow after school and I would spend the night at 'Alice'. It was already arranged.

"Edward, everybody is staring, look at Tanya, I think she wants me dead." I said. He smiled, he had a plan and it was obvious.

"I think we should give them something to look at" he said and pulled me onto his lap. He leaned closer and kissed me. I waited so long to kiss him, to hold him. He pulled back after a short passionate kiss and smiled.

Everybody was looking and then after a moment of silence everybody started to applause and wolf whistle.

The rest of the day went bay quickly and afterwards I went straight to my home, my real home, with Edward. We stopped and when I got out the car, Bettina stormed out the door.

I took her in a tight hug and for the second time, tears started to run. She held me tight and I pulled away to kiss her cheek. She was still in my arms when Jasper grabbed her from behind. I walked inside. "Bella, were going to dinner, do you guys wanna come?" Alice asked.

"I want to chill but you can go, Bettina are you joining them?" I asked. She nodded. They were gone in about an hour and I was alone with Edward and we were sitting on the couch. "I think we need to celebrate." He said.

I nodded. He walked to the cupboard and I didn't expect him to appear with a bottle apple sours but he did.

This was going to be fun. What can it do right? He sat next to me with a devilish look. I took the bottle from him. It was a huge bottle of booze. "Wow, its triple strength." I said and laughed. He smirked.

We started to drink it slowly but later we drank straight from the bottle. There weren't much left and I could feel my head spinning and my I started to feel numb.

I didn't feel so good and I knew I better keep quite or I would spill my guts, but did I have something to spill? He knew everything important. "Bella . . . I need to . . . I." he couldn't speak clearly. He was to drunk.

He had the bottle in his hand and I took it. It was empty, now I knew why he was drunker then me. "What t t's . . . wrong" I asked. He smiled. "I kissed Tanya." He said, he what talking about getting shocked sober. "What, why did you do that" I asked. I was bursting with anger, well I did tell him he could date. "I didn't want to." He said.

"Oh, oh, of course you didn't want to, you couldn't get out of a girls grip?" I asked. I don't know what but I flung the bottle to him and he caught it. He threw it back and it came for me. I froze and it hit me on the side of the head. The one person, who would never hurt me, hit me with a bottle.

Perfect. I felt alone, more then ever. I started to cry. "I'm sorry; I did tell you to date. I knew I would never be enough for you." I said, stepping on the broken glass and running to my room. He was following me but I was faster.

I slipped and landed on the stairs. He tried to help me but I flinched away. "Leave me alone." I said. I got up and ran to my room, crying. I walked to the mirror, my face hurt.

I had a bruise from my right eye to my ear. Wow he threw hard. The blood vessels were sitting close to my skin. I fell on the bed and drifted to sleep, alone.

"Bella, wake up. You need to wake up." Jasper said. I didn't want to. "Urggg, five more minutes." I asked. My head was burning, not acing, burning.

I turned and felt a burning sensation go to my face. I sat up but fell down again. I opened my eyes, witch was red and swollen. I squeezed them and opened it again. I tried to focus on Jasper but my vision blurred. I sighed. He didn't look mad, just worried.

"I'm fine, I had to blow of steam and I drank a bit." I said. Oh, no school. "I know but it's about Edward." He said. What happened? "Is he okay" I yelled.

"Ow, my head hurts." I said. Jasper laughed at me. I bet I deserved it. "He's fine; he fell asleep on the floor." He said pointing at my door. "Why did he do that?" I asked. "He's not going to move until you speak to him." He said.

I shrugged; he could stay there for a day, or two. I didn't even notice that nothing had changed from my room. I had only a little time left until we turned eighteen.

"Let him come in." I said. "I need a bat or a knife." I said. He laughed again. Edward came into my room, not even lifting his feet.

His hands were on his face, wiping his eyes. He looked bad. "Bella I'm sorry, for everything." He started. "I'm to, I really love you." I said.

"I love you to, I'm sorry about the bottle; I never meant to hurt you. I'm a monster. I'm sorry." He said, crying. He cried, wow he didn't cry a lot. "It's okay and about the kiss, I told you to date other people so it's not your fault." I said.

"Bella -" I cut him of. "We could still be friends." I said it felt like my heart was falling on the floor when I said that.

I was heartless. "I don't-" not again. "Edward, when I told you that from this high and we could fall. You promised you would fall with me and never let me go." I said and took a breath.

"It feels like you dropped me and now we are light year away. I think we should be friends. I want to be with you to but maybe it's not the right time." I said. I cried now, I wanted him so bad.

"I love you." He said. "I love you to." I said. I fell on the bed still tired and he joined me. He pulled me closer until my nose touched his chest. I turned around and moved as far as the bed allowed. "Edward, please." I said.

I closed my eyes and let the tears stream freely. I didn't want this. Why did he do that? I hated him. Not really, I loved him.

"I gave you an hour now you need to get to school." Jasper said. I got up and walked to the bathroom, I took a shower and some pain pills. My head was killing me and my eyes well, nothing I could do about them. I walked back to the room and Edward was gone. I got dressed and pulled the comb through my hair.

I went downstairs and everyone was waiting for me, except for Edward. We walked to the car in silence, except for Bettina who wanted to know why I was sad. I told her I fell. It would explain the bruise. The stupid, apple sours bruise.

Edward was leaning against his car. He looked up and grinned at me. "Nice of you to grace us with your presence" He said. Oh smartass.

"Just leave me alone, please." I almost begged. I didn't feel good. I got in the back of the car and Jasper got in with me. "I think you should sit in front." I told him. He shrugged.

"I can't the fabulous Tanya is joining us today." He said. My mouth fell open. He had the guts to invite her, after he was sorry.

He leaned into my window and I closed my eyes. "You can't still be tired." He said. This was it. "I am, you didn't get a bottle to the head and your heart wasn't ripped out you chest okay so back off." I yelled.

I got out of the car and walked towards mine. He grabbed my arm but I pulled back. "Don't touch me." I said. He grabbed my hand again. "I'm sorry, I didn't think-" "You never think. Just leave me the hell alone." I said. He backed away slowly and retreated to his car.

He got into the car and spun out of the driveway. I sat in the car for a while until Jasper got in and drove to school. I got out and walked straight to homeroom.

Everybody was shocked to see Tanya get out of Edward's car. I didn't know how I was going to survive. Everybody shot an apologetic glance at me as I walked by. I kept my face down and concentrated on my shoes as I walked.

It was time for lunch and I walked with Mike, one of my friends. He was the only one to leave me alone and he didn't ask about Edward, so he was the only one I told. It was in my free period. We walked to my locker.

"I know all of this is to fast, but would you like to go to dinner, as friends?" He asked. I thought about that for a bit. "That would be nice, but as friends for now, right?" I asked.

He nodded and smiled. He was beautiful. His brown hair emphasized his deep blue eyes but it was nothing against Edward. _Stop thinking about him_ I turned around to see Edward was standing behind me. He grabbed my hand and pulled me toward some kind of stationary store room.

He pushed me against the wall. A few memories flood to me from a couple of months ago. I closed my eyes, sliding to the ground.

"Why am I always fucking things up, I am so sorry Bella. I am not going to hurt you." He said. I knew Edward wouldn't leave me but it was tough. It was bored into my head. I wanted to cry, I wanted to crawl into the fetus position and never leave. Edward pulled me up.

"I am sorry I am not a there and it seem like I don't care but I do. I am your best friend after all." He said.

"You're hardly that anymore, I mean you have other stuff to, I don't want you to worry twenty four seven." I said. "I am your best friend." He said. I knew that.

"Well you're doing a crabby job. I don't need a best friend when he is being like this." I said and stormed out of the room. "Bella," he yelled and urged to my arm again. "Touch me and I'll scream." I yelled. He stood there and I walked back to my locker.

I went to my foster home after school. I didn't even get to see Bettina; she was gone before we left. I missed her so much. This was the worst day ever. I opened the door and Gloria sat in the chair. She was watching some old people show.

"What happened to your face?" She asked. Jasper went straight upstairs. "I fell down the stairs when I was at my friends." I lied, smoothly. "Okay, well I made lunch." She said.

"Thank you but I'm really not hungry. Maybe later" I said. "Oh and can I go out with a friend on Friday?" I asked. "Is it your boyfriend?" She asked. "No, we aren't together anymore." I said. She smiled, what was her case, she didn't even know him.

"Yes, you can go out then." She answered. "Thank you." I said and ran upstairs. I got out of my clothes for my comfortable short and tank top. It was warm today. I fell into my bed and started to cry again. I knew a relationship would do this.

I heard a light thud on my window. I heard voices to. "Juliet, o Juliet Open your window." Someone said, not someone Edward.

He had the arrogance to come here. I lifted my blinds and opened my window and a small rock hit me in the head. "You just can't stop hurting me?" I whispered. "Let me in, please Juliet." He said. "You're at the wrong house; I'm not Juliet or Tanya." I said.

"Now, I know I'm at the right house." He said. "Fine, come in." I said. He was very flexible. He jumped into the tree and made his way up to my window.

He slid through my window in one fluent movement. I sat on my bed. "What are you doing here?" I asked him. "I wanted to talk to you." He said. "Fine, talk" I ordered him. "I am really sorry I did this to you. I know how much you like . . . d me. I hope you can forgive me." I sighed. I wanted to go over him and kiss the smoke out of him, but I couldn't.

"I forgive you. I did tell you that you should date other people." I said. He shrugged. I thought of the kiss in the bathroom and then my mind went back when I danced in my underwear.

I was so happy. I smiled at the memories that would never leave my heart. "What are you smiling about?" He asked.

"I was just thinking." I said. He smiled as soon as he got pulled into the same memories. He suddenly pulled me closer and our heads touched. I couldn't. I pulled away. "Edward, no, I'm not going to be the girl you cheat on her with. I know you only kissed but it looks like you have a thing." I said. He looked sad. "I hate that you're not happy." He said.

"Listen to me, are you happy?" I asked. "Yes -" I cut him of. "If you are happy and the people around me are happy, then I am happy." I said. He kept quite.

"Bella, come here I need to talk to you." Gloria said. "You better go, Edward." I said. He gave me a hug and walked to the door. "I'll see you at school." I said. He kissed my cheek in a very friendly way and ducked out of my window. I ran downstairs.

"Hey what's wrong?" I asked. "Something came up, John's mother died and we need to fly to Durban for a couple of days. Will you be okay alone?" She asked.

"Yes, how long would you be away?" I asked. "For a month I'm going to give you enough money for everything you need, so don't worry.

If you don't want to be alone, you can come." "No it's okay, we are grown up. I am very sorry about John's mother. When are you leaving?" I asked. I couldn't help but feel glad. "In about an hour, we just need to pack." She said.

After they left I made dinner. I sat across from Jasper who was very silent. "What's wrong?" I asked. "I don't know I feel kind of worried, about you. Call me crazy but I feel the need to protect you." He said. What, this was weird. "Jasper. It's okay, you're probably just stressed." I said. "Yes your right. I invited Alice to dinner, I hope you don't mind." He said.

"No, it's fine" I said and on queue, she walked into the dining room with a plate of food. She laughed and sat next to Jasper. She looked different. "You look strange. You're very hyper and your eyes are glowing. OMG you two had s-" I was cut by hands on my mouth.

"SHUT UP." They both yelled at the same time. I laughed and nodded. They released me. "I can't believe it." I said. The smiled at each other and then the thought kicked in.

"Oh eeuw, you guys. I'm eating." I mocked.

They just laughed, I decided that I would never have that again, that sparkling eyes lid up from the love inside.

Two weeks past and believe it or not, I didn't speak to Edward once. We never had time because he was always with her.

The date with Mike was fun but I wasn't ready for anything so he finally gave up. I went by Alice everyday to spend the day with Bettina. My life was good but not great. It was fun but not thrilling. It was worth living at least.

I was sitting at the lunch table with Alice, and two other friends of ours. I watched Edward from the other side of the cafeteria at the jock table. Since he revived himself from being gay he now was captain of the first rugby team. Tanya was sitting on his lap.

It was disgusting. He saw me and smiled but I just looked down. A tear escaped my eye but I killed it before someone saw it.

I wished he was still gay. Her skirt was so short I could see al the cellulite. I looked down at my shirt and was suddenly very self conscious. _You belong with me,_ I thought wile I looked at my food. I wasn't even hungry.

The bell rang and I walked off to biology. I sat on the chair I usually did. Then Tanya and Edward came in, she was laughing until she saw me. "Oh, what happened to your face?" She said pointing at my scar I got from the bottle. "I fell downstairs." I said and looked at Edward.

He looked down. Bastard, ashole, he was too ashamed to see what he did. "Clumsy little bitch." She said and walked to her seat. I sighed and went on with scrabbling on my notebook.

I walked into my room and my heart almost stopped when I saw Edward on my bed. I don't know how he got over here this fast.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him. He smiled. "I'm sorry." He said. I sat on the bed next to him. He looked sad. "For what, why are you sorry?"I asked. "I'm the worst best friend ever." He said. For the first time I let myself go, I could live with the pain afterwards but I needed him, I wanted to feel his kiss again. I closed the space between us and gave him a hug.

He smiled at my action. I got up remembering the box I wanted to give him. I got up and walked to my dresser.

He followed me, willingly. I opened the top drawer and got out what I wanted, it was a huge flip file with a bunch of songs. It had about twenty songs and thirty poems. He wouldn't know the difference. I gave it to him and he started reading the first one.

It was written the night he told me he loved someone. An unwilling sob escaped my chest but I wasn't crying yet. "It's all the songs, everything I ever wrote that was about you.

The top one is the latest one I wrote and it goes down till about fifteen." I said and just stood there while he read. He looked up and his eyes was suddenly smoldering.

The flip file fell on the floor and he pressed me against the wall, our foreheads touched. His lips touched mine and I kissed him with everything I had. I flicked my tong across his bottom lip. He shivered. He threw me in his arms and walked to the bed. I fell in my pillow and he hovered over me. He kissed me again but it didn't feel like it should. I tried to pull away. I didn't lead him on.

"I don't want this." I said. He seemed to surrender and sat across from me. "I give up, what do you want?" He asked. I snapped you stuck the wrong cord there. "I want all of you, I want Edward, the sweet loving, handsome, romantic guy, the one who always kept his promise and who loved me. I want respect. I don't want you to throw stones at my window or break into my house. I want you to defend me against that sun of a B-" he stopped me.

"We broke up." He said. "Why would you leave the B-"he kissed me. "Because, I want you and only you if I can't have you, ill ever have anyone ever again." He said.

I laughed. "No, you can have me." I said. He smiled. I know that wasn't possible but in the sense of the word, well.

He kissed me again. He was mine, he broke up with the SL . . . slug. He pushed me down on the bed and kissed me.

The kissing was great, we never kissed like this. My door busted open. "Oh, no I think I'm going blind." Jasper said. "Get lost." I mumbled.

He didn't move. I got of the bed and slid out the door. "Guess what Edward, they had S-" before I could finish, a sneaker came my way. I ducked and ran. Jasper was close, he was fast and I realized I wasn't.

I ran through the hallway and he caught up with me. He grabbed me and pushed me to the wall playfully. I laughed very hard and unladylike. "You better take it back." he said. I smiled. "What the fact that you had s-" he placed a hand over my mouth.

I liked his hand and he pulled away. "Eeuw, you licked me." he said. I laughed again.

He tickled me and I couldn't do anything, he was to strong. "Okay, sorry." I said. He released me and I started to run.

"Not," I yelled at him. I looked back and his face was horror struck. "Bells . . . watch out." Edward yelled and when I looked I was approaching the stairs and tripped. I saw the ground coming and I fell down the stairs.

**So what do you think? I hope it was okay. Let me know please. **

**Love **


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey, okay next chapter. Tell me if you had enough of my story.**

**LP & CG**

**# -#**

**I had a dream.**

Everything came back to me now, I remember playing with Jasper and then I fell down the stairs. Great, of course it would happen to me. I opened my eyes and saw a very angst Edward about an inch from my face. I smiled at him. I wasn't in the hospital, I was in my room on my bed and he was hovering over me.

I looked into his eyes; they say that it's the window to your soul. I liked what I saw. His eyes were smoldering. I smiled again and he smiled back. I care so much about him. I love him so much. "Hello" he said after a very long time.

"Hi" I whispered. I took his face in my hands and kissed him.

It wasn't hasty it was sweet. I released him and pushed him of me so I could sit. We sat crossed legged on the bed.

_It was funny how we didn't speak but said so much, how we didn't look at each other but saw so much and how we didn't touch but we were one. _With that I decided to climb into his lap and he held me tight. "How is your head?" he asked. "It's okay, it doesn't hurt . . . much." I joked.

He smiled with me. "I can get you something if you want to." He said and started to tug on me to get free. "NO, I have anything I want right here." I said and kissed his cheek.

He leaned down to kiss me but we were interrupted by a cough. "Hey, I am sorry about earlier, I didn't think it would get out of hand." Jasper apologized. "No Jasper, its fine, it was fun." I encouraged him.

He smiled at me and left. "Edward, I need to do something today, wait what's the time?" I asked.

"It's 3 in the morning." He said. It was too dangerous to go now. "I'll go tomorrow after school, will you go with me?" I asked. "Yes but where are we going?" he asked egger. "I need to go and see Charlie." I said.

His face became horrid; he stiffened and gripped my waist. "Why, why would you want to go there?" he asked.

"I need to, it's not like he can do anything to me." I said and smiled. It didn't work. "You can't go." He said. "I can and I am Edward." I said. He was angry.

He collected himself and sighed. "Okay we'll go. I'll be there for you no matter how mad you are." He said. I smiled and kissed him again.

I went to take a shower and when I came out Edward was asleep under the covers. He looked pained and that broke my heart. I wasn't very good for him. I got in beside him and fell asleep.

_I couldn't make out if this was a dream or not. It was raining very hard and I was laying in Edwards arms. "Hold on Bella, please. I'm going to get help." He said. "No please don't leave me, stay here." I said._

_The raindrops were pounding on my face and I couldn't feel the pain anymore. I closed my eyes and with a last breath my body relaxed. _

I woke up screaming. What was this was this how I was going to die, no, what. It was so real, I'm alive. I didn't notice Edward sitting up next to me.

He kissed my cheek and held me tight. I cried into his side. I didn't want that to happen, I needed Edward, I wanted to live. I suddenly remembered who was John? "Edward, do you have an uncle named John?" I asked.

I knew it was absurd but I had to know. He looked puzzled. "Yes, he's a doctor at Brits med clinic. He's the doctor who took care of you the last time you were in the hospital." He said. I cried. How was this possible?

"How did you know, I never told you about him." he said. "I have no idea, no, wait I know, I dreamt of him. I had a dream. It was horrible." I said.

He smiled. "You did hit your head pretty hard." He joked. "You don't understand. I died. In the dream, I was dying and nobody could help me.

If John is a reality then maybe. . ." I wondered of. He took my face in his hands. "Look at me, nothing is going to happen while I am here, you got that?" He asked. I smiled and fell into the pillow.

I was on my way to the grave yard, I don't know why but I was tense. Jasper was furious when I told him and slammed the door in my face.

I hated him right now, at least I had Edward. He was so wonderful. He cared about me. Last night's dream really freaked me out. It was so real, I could feel it.

Edward took my hand when we got out of the car. We walked slowly to his grave. When we got there I sat by the grave stone cross legged. I touched it as if it wasn't real.

I was beautiful, like I would have wanted it to be. He was my dad after all. Edward wasn't there anymore; he probably gave me some time. "Dad, why did you do this?" I asked and tears started to well up and were starting to spill over.

"We could have been good, a real family. Well I've been to cape town and back." I said and sobbed. "Why dad, I can't understand." I said,

I was crying very violently now, no wonder Edward ran away. I closed my eyes and let the hurt take over. When I opened it again Edward sat beside me and took me into his strong arms, I scrambled into his lap. We sat there for what felt like hours. He picked me up and supported me to the car.

I looked back once again. "I love you dad . . ." I whispered and walked in silence to the car. We didn't talk, he didn't say anything.

I leaned against the leather seats. I pulled myself together once we were home, well I wasn't home I was at my temporary house. I walked in and went straight to the kitchen to start dinner. Jasper and Alice were sitting on the couch with Bettina, she ran to me and I took her in a tight hug. I haven't seen her in a long time.

She kissed my cheek and I just held her tighter. I sat her on the counter while I made dinner. One month and two weeks and I could be eighteen and have my life back. I could see Bettina again every day.

I finished quickly and placed the food on the table. Bettina was on the one side and Edward was on my other side and Alice next to Jasper across from the room. I ate in silence, while everyone was making conversation.

I didn't want to talk. I looked at Jasper and when he looked at me, I looked down. I couldn't shake that dream off; I still felt something bad coming. Was this what Jasper talked about a couple of weeks ago? "What do you think Bella?" Edward asked.

When he touched my arm I got frightened witch made me press my hand hard on the table and my empty plate flew on the ground.

"Think about what?" I asked. "Wow, you're so out of it. We were talking about a camping trip." He said. Camping didn't seem to sound fun, with Jasper and the dream. "I think you should enjoy it." I said getting up and walking to the kitchen with the plates.

I got a garbage bag and walked to the dining room to pick up the broken plate. "We want you to go to." He said and smiled. I lowered to my knee and started picking up the broken pieces. They were silent. "I don't think it's such a good idea, I'll spoil the fun." I said still picking up the plate. I was near tears, everything was just too much.

I couldn't handle everything right now. I was almost finished when Edward told me he would do it, he took the bag from me. I got mad for some reason.

"I can do it I'm not incompetent." I said a bit too loud. "I never said that I just want to help." He said patiently. "I don't need help." I yelled and grabbed the bag from him. He grabbed it back and I started picking up the pieces again.

He placed a hand on my shoulder but I flipped it off. I had a large chunk of plate in my hand and gripped it tighter.

"Let me help you." He said. I grabbed the bag from him one more time and he took it right out of my hand. "I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP!" I yelled. He smiled, he smiled, the stupid ass. "Stop laughing at me, I'll shove this up you're a-" I was interrupted by his kissing.

I didn't want to kiss him. I pulled back and he was mad now. He tried to grab the piece of plate out of my hand but instead I gripped tighter.

He pulled and I felt something burn my palm and then I saw blood streaming from my hand. "Urg you're such an ass." I said and ran upstairs. He followed me. I went into the bathroom and wrapped my hand in an old towel.

"Bella come out." he said slamming on the door. He was mad, it was clear. "I won't, leave me alone." I yelled. I rushed to my room and he followed again. I searched for some kind of bandage for my hand.

I took of the towel from my hand and I almost yelled. It was a very deep cut and it was gross, not to mention all the blood. I wrapped it up again.

He came into my room and I glared at him. "Let me see your hand." He said. "No" I said and walked to the drawer. He came closer. "Show me your hand stupid." He said. "No, don't talk to me like that." I yelled.

"Let me see your hand then." He yelled. "I hate you." I yelled. "I hate you more." He yelled even harder. "Do you want to kiss me as much as I want to kiss you?" I asked. He didn't answer he just pulled me closer and started to kiss me eagerly. "I think we need to get your hand checked." He said when he pulled back smiling.

After we went to check my hand, we were on our way home. I had to get tem stitches and I can explain the process as gory. I could see the bone. I shuddered when John, Edward's uncle sewed me up. That stupid dream didn't do me very well. I jumped for the most random stuff and I was in thought a lot.

When we stopped at the house my foster parents were there, I could see their car. "Shit Edward, they can't see you, I don't want to get into trouble." I said. He nodded. "I really don't want to leave you now." He moaned. "I think I can't help you till tomorrow." I said and leaned closer to kiss him. The kiss was full of Passion and love.

He bit my lower lip and then I felt his tong in my mouth. That was the first time we French kissed and if I knew it would feel like this I would have done it the first time.

He seemed reluctant to let me go but I pulled back from him. "I think you can manage till tomorrow." I said and jumped out of the car and walked into the house swiftly. I was met by Jasper, thank goodness.

"Hey Jazz, I hope you covered for me." I said. "Hey, yes as far as they know, Alice took you to the hospital." He said. I lost track of time and saw it was about six. My hand was really hurting and I couldn't make a fist. I was going to feel that in the morning.

"Jasper, you're a lifesaver. I owe you big time." I said. "Yes about that, I want to sneak out tonight, can you cover for me?" He asked.

What I wouldn't give to sleep in Edward's arms. "Sure think. Be nice and wear-" he flung a pillow at me. "Fine, I always wanted a nephew." I said but I couldn't continue because he was chancing me upstairs.

I ran into my room and he didn't follow, which was a good thing because I was out of breath. I wondered where my foster's was and like they could read my mind I heard a knock on the door. "Come in." I yelled and sat on the bed.

Gloria entered the room and sat next to me. "Sweetie, I heard about your hand, I hope you're okay." She said.

I wanted to be nice but I could hear the fake worry in her voice. "I had worse but thank you for caring." I said. "Anytime dear, I heard about the party on Friday, are you planning on going?" She asked.

Oh, I forgot all about the party. I was planning on going. "If it's okay with you and if my hand is okay." I said and looked at her. "You can go but you need to be back by twelve."

She said. "Thank you and I will be back then." I said. With that she left my room and I went to take a shower.

My hand hurt like hell when it was under the warm water. I wrapped it again and got into my comfortable shorts and shirt. I fell onto my bed and remembered about Jasper. I walked downstairs. "Hey Gloria, I'm going to bed. I took pain pills and I'll probably be out for the rest of the night. No need to check up on me." I said. "Yes we are very tired so have a nice night." She said and walked upstairs.

I followed her and she said goodnight to Jasper. I went to his room after locking mine. "Kay Jazz, I locked my room and made sure she won't come to check on me." I said.

"Thank you so much. Peace." He said and swiftly jumped through the window. Before I got into his bed I took a couple of pain pills from the bathroom cupboard. I locked the door and then I got into bed and fell asleep.

About an hour later I heard a knock on the door, o crap. "Jasper, are you okay? You need something?" Gloria asked. What should I do? I let out a loud ground and mumbled fine. "Okay honey sleep tight." She said and fled to her room.

I let out a sigh of relieve and went back to sleep.

_I was running around the pool, it was a warm day in Brits. It was sunny and a perfect day for swimming. _

_Alice and Jasper was playing inside the pool while I got in. Edward sat on the step and waited for me. Then Bettina came running out of the house and just before she landed in the pool she fell and hit her head . . . _

I woke up from one of the worst dreams, something was wrong with me. My dreams were so much more real and it was like watching it through a television.

I shook it off and went to the bathroom. I was awake now and I grabbed my guitar. I played with the cords until I couldn't keep my eyes open.

Today was Thursday and I woke up to a nice sunny day. I walked to the bathroom to take a shower. Afterwards I went downstairs. My hand was still sore and I decided to wrap it once again. I got something to eat and I could see Jasper didn't look good.

"Jazz, what happened?" I asked. "Nothing but I have this feeling again that something is going to happen." He said. Maybe he was just paranoid.

"Everything is going to be fine Jasper." I said. He smiled and then we walked back to the car. "I think we should go to Edward's after school. Maybe we could take a swim or something." He said. "That's a great idea. I need to talk to Alice about the party anyway."

School was extremely slow and we all decided to go to Edward's afterwards. The last bell rang and it wasn't a minute too soon. I drove with Edward and Alice took my car because I wanted to pick Bettina from Pre School.

She was very excited about our plans and spending a whole day together. She was even more beautiful every day. We stopped at our house and I went up to Alice's room with Bettina.

The swim suit was way skimpy so I wore a short over it and I got Bettina a beautiful silver one piece. She looked like a little doll.

We walked outside and Edward was sitting on the steps. Jasper was already in and Alice joined him by jumping in. Edward splashed me and I ran around the pool. It felt like I was in some kind of De ju vu, Edward sitting on the steps and Alice playing with Jasper.

I remembered now. It was my dream. I could hear footsteps. I was on the other side of the pool. "Edward get out Bettina is going to fall. Grab her now." I yelled.

Edward looked confused but when he saw my tears he did as I asked. On queue Bettina came running from inside and just as she was about to fall Edwards hands caught her.

When she was saved and in Edwards's arms everybody looked at me. I fell on the ground in a lump. I couldn't feel anything.

I sat on the ground staring into the unseen distance. I couldn't focus. I could feel a lump in my throat and I could feel my heart rate and breathing picking up. I couldn't think straight. I felt like I couldn't breathe, like I was having some kind of panic attack.

Was I going crazy? Jasper saw this coming. He felt it. I dreamt it. If this dream was true what about the other one, the one where I- No please I can't die. I don't want to die. It all got worse, now I really couldn't breathe and I sucked in as much breath as I could.

EPOV

Bella o Bella, she was sitting on the ground with a blank stare. I walked over to her. Suddenly she got worse, she couldn't breathe. I took her in my arms.

"Breath Bella Breath" I said. I knew it seemed wrong but I shook her as hard as I could. She had to snap out of this. She snapped out of it and pulled me closer. She was panting now, trying to get more air then possible.

"Edward, last night I dreamt about this. It happened exactly like this that's why I could stop it." She said. She had a dream. No what about the dream the other night. That dream can't be true. This can't happen. I won't allow it.

"Don't worry Bella, I am here. Nothing will happen to you." I whispered. She relaxed a little but still not fully.

After I calmed her down she was sitting on the couch. Bettina was nestled in my lap and I sat tight next to Bella. Bettina was asleep now and Jasper sat next to Alice on the couch in front of us.

Bella was still sort of out of it and I had to wrap a blanket around her because she shivered like crazy.

BPOV

After about an hour of arguing I convinced then that I was going to the party today and I was sitting on my bed while Alice dressed me up. She was already finished when she got here so I was the only torture victim.

My hand was better but not great. By now I was convinced it was just a coincidence. I started to believe them but I still wondered how. I was looking forward to the party. I could hang out with some of our friends.

After the torture ended we were on our way to the party. We got there at seven and to my surprise Mike Newton was already drunk.

I made a mental note to avoid him. Edward looked stunning like always and I felt so normal next to him. Of course he made me feel like a queen, like Juliet. I pulled him closer and kissed him fast. "Dance with me Romeo." I said and he pulled me to the dance floor.

The party was more fun that I have in months. I waited for Edward while he had to go and break up some fight in the back.

I saw Mike Newton sitting on the couch and when he saw me he came towards me. Oh no he had to come here. He approached me and I winched at his breath. "Bella, wanna play?" He asked. "Eeuw Mike, get away from me." I said.

He only came closer. He pulled me through the crowd and my screams were muffled by the loud music. I could see Edward but he couldn't see me.

Mike dragged me to his room and I never noticed how strong he was. He threw me on the bed and I tried to get off but he pressed all of his weight onto me and that breath. I had to get away. My dress caught up and was now mid-thigh. "Bella this was going to be fun." He spluttered. I cringed when he kissed me.

I had to get him off of me. He was heavy. He placed his hand on my knee and he moved up to my thigh. I was getting very uncomfortable. He pressed his lips to mine again but then he touched the skin just above my breast. I couldn't get away. I felt his hands at the hem of my underwear and I knew I couldn't let him do this to me. I won't go through it again. I won't let him take over my live. He was still too strong while I tried to push him off.

I couldn't stop him and I couldn't understand that one person should go through this twice. Once was enough but twice. When it was almost too late I kicked him so hard he fell of the bed. It was to close and it almost happened again.

It was too close, I repeated again. I hated my life I hate Mike Newton. I went downstairs and Edward was looking for me. His eyes were horrid when he couldn't find me.

His eyes met mine and he stormed in my direction. When he was close enough he tried to wrap his arms around me but I couldn't, I took a step back. His eyes were full of hurt but I just couldn't.

I ran as fast as I could to outside, down the street and to my house. It was about two miles but I made it without even being tired. I fell on my bed and got rid of all my clothes.

I took a shower and scrubbed myself until my skin was raw. I got out and went to sleep immediately.

EPOV

What happened to her, why did she storm off like that? Just then a very drunk Mike Newton came from upstairs; I was surprised he was awake because he looked like he should be out cold by now.

"Hey Eddie, you should take better care of your girl, she's very willing." He said. What, Bella would never sleep with Mike Newton. She wouldn't go that low.

"Mike what did you do to her?" I asked while I grabbed a fist full of his shirt.

"Nothing that I can remember" He said and winked. I had to find Bella. "If you done anything to hurt her, you will die." I said and stormed out of the building.

All I could do now is search for her; I went to her home first. She would be there most likely. I hope Mike didn't do anything bad to her.

I promised her I would save her. I lied, I couldn't hold my promise. If Ben and Eric didn't hit the shit out of each other I could have helped her.

I ran to her room and there she was griddling her knees and fast asleep. She looked beautiful but the pained expression on her face gave it away that she wasn't as peaceful as she looked. I didn't want to bother her but what if he raped her, could she handle it again? I sat next to her, careful not to touch her, just in case and patted her on her shoulder. "Bella, you need to wake up." I said.

She groaned. Maybe I should let her sleep, so I got of the bed, grabbed a pillow from her closet and made myself uncomfortably, comfortable on the pillow.

BPOV

I woke up and everything was sore, I wasn't used to running and it didn't help that I almost got raped by Mike Newton.

I sat up in the bed and saw Edward lying lumpy on the couch. He didn't look peaceful. I walked over to him. I was scared to touch him but I knew he would never do anything to me.

I touched his shoulder and he was awake in an instant. "Hey Edward, I'm sorry about last night . . . I just . . . I, he . . . I'm sorry." I said and started to sob. He didn't know what to do so I pulled him closer and scrambled into his lap.

"It's okay, don't cry. What happened?" He asked. "I couldn't help it, he was to strong. Mike dragged me upstairs and he was drunk." I said. "Bella, did he do anything to you, did he-" he couldn't get out the word.

"He didn't Rape me, almost. It was so close." I said. "I'm sorry I wasn't there to help you. I'm so glad you got away." he said. "Edward, I love you." I said. "I love you to." "You know I mean I'm in love with you right." I asked. A wide smile covered his face. "Since the first day of Pre School" He said and kissed me on the cheek.

**That's it. Hope you like. **

**Love**


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